Sep 30

Mommy, Is There A Safe Way To Make Meth?


Don’t Use A Bottle, Use Your Parent’s Garage!

Addiction is hell. I used to smoke, and I can remember wondering if the suffering lung cancer might cause was worth the risk if I could just get some nicotine. I quit smoking many times. I even quit for a whole month when I was in college, but then something upset me and I started again. Finally, 9 years, one month, 10 hours, 10 minutes and 55 seconds ago, I gave up cigarettes for good.

I have had many clients who were addicted to substances our gov’ment thinks we should forgo. I have represented several coke heads, huffers, prescription abusers, and more pot heads than you can count. I’ve given up on counting the pot heads. I get to about ten and forget what I’m doing. None of these drugs are health food. They all, except for the pot,  are addictive and dangerous. However, the drug that is the granddaddy of life destroyers has to be meth amphetamine.

I did a search on Google once that netted thousands of meth recipes. There are so many ingredients that are readily available  that many people run their own meth labs for fun and profit. Now, there is a limit on how much cold medicine you can buy. The manufacturers rely on “smurfs” to procure enough Sudafed  to make a batch of meth. If you could get $50.00 for a package of OTC  cold remedy, you might be tempted to help out your friendly  neighborhood meth maker.

Now, a widespread addiction to meth  has inspired some clever soul to devise a way to make the drug in a pop bottle. The process is called “Shake And Bake”, which certainly sounds friendlier than the old “NAZI” method. The problem with this recipe, a few unfortunate Texans discovered is the “Bake” part. You see, some of the stuff you use to make meth is highly explosive, and thus a car isn’t the best place to cook it.

I would be first to say that meth is a horrible thing, no matter how it is made, or who it is made by. It is easy to become addicted to meth, and it is one of the hardest addictions to kick. It ravages your body and destroys your mind. So, the headline to the story above didn’t really tickle my funny bone as much as make me ponder. To me, the headline “‘Shake-and-bake’ meth making has a dangerous side” seems so understated. It’s like there is a safe way to produce the stuff, and I don’t think that’s the case. If there was, there would be even more people doing it.

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